Get a Hobby When You're Ready

I don't know about you, but when my wiser friends used to tell me to find a hobby, I never really understood why I should. The common answer was that it would make you a more interesting person when it came to interviews or making friends, but that never felt like a compelling reason to seriously pursue one.

I used to find it hard to focus on anything other than my main goal at one time. No hobby felt engaging or exciting, maybe except for taking a long stroll every evening. I even felt a little insecure about not having a cool hobby and dismissed how I was spending my time, whether it was job hunting, working on my portfolio, or nurturing relationships. But now that I feel somewhat settled, I found myself twiddling my thumbs, unable to sit still. It has finally come a point where having a hobby made sense (to me).

During slower periods of my life, I did have hobbies and they were just that. Fun activities that distracted my mind from reality for short periods. Aiming for excellence wasn't a goal. When people say that to be great in life, you should be aim to be excellent in everything that you do, I used to think, how exhausting...but I also had some doubts. Is that the mindset I need to achieve wordly greatness? I still don't know the answer, but I do know that everyone has strengths and weaknesses, and hobbies are meant to be fun. And "fun" doesn't always mean "easy," I've realized.

I recently picked up painting after my husband surprised me with an easel on my birthday. He said, "You need a hobby!" And just like that, sometimes the hobby chooses you. While I was able to complete my first painting within a few hours—and with great satisfaction—I found myself stumped on my second, third, and fourth pieces...Paintings that I started within a couple of days or hours from starting the one before because I was unhappy and frustrated that they weren't turning out the way I had hoped.

Instead of giving up and starting yet another painting, I decided to keep working on what I had already started. I painted over my earlier strokes, trying to fix mistakes or hoping that the next brushstroke would appear as intended. After hours and hours and several sittings, the paintings evolved. The vision became clearer.

Is it a master piece? Not yet. Will it ever be? I don't know. But I've learned that hobbies requiring some level of skill will reward you with improvement over time, if you're patient. Sometimes it takes intentional effort and awareness, but I think it eventually becomes muscle memory. Instead of focusing on creating something amazing, I've found it helpful to just pick up the brush and put paint on the canvas. It's not a big deal, but we often make it one. When you treat it as something "just for fun," it's a lot easier to get started and to keep going, session after session.

Hobbies do help you escape the stress of life, and sometimes, they're not the very first activity that comes to mind when you have free time. They are what you make of them. For some, a hobby is simply just that, and for others, it provides an opportunity to experiment and learn without pressure, like how painting and pickleball helped me truly see the value of repetition. Constant exposure to frustrating and scary "oopsy" moments removed some of that fear of failure and self-disappointment, because now I know, with enough time and practice, I'll eventually get there, and so will you!